Can sisters help keep brothers from sinning?

Found this letter here

Girls, could we talk to you right out of our hearts for a few minutes? 
It is awkward for us to talk about something of this nature, in person, 
so we thought we would write our feelings.
We are young men who have been saved and baptized in the Holy Spirit. 
We desperately want to live for Christ and not follow the ways of the 
world. Since we have been baptized (immersed) in a “Holy” Spirit, we 
feel in our hearts that we should live “holy” lives. After all, our 
bodies are the temple, the sanctuary, the place where the “Holy” Spirit 
lives and makes His home.
We know that guys and girls are affected differently, so since we 
desperately want to follow hard after God, could we kindly and 
respectfully ask you to help us with a few things?
We realize that girls are primarily stimulated or turned on by “touch.” 
Did you know that guys are turned on by “sight?” So when you are 
“aroused” (sexually awakened) by a guy’s “touch,” we are in the same 
way aroused by mere “sight.” Let us explain. When we see girls who are 
dressed in a suggestive, revealing, provocative, teasing, tantalizing 
manner, our sexual desires are aroused. Our bodies are then affected. 
To be absolutely candid, let us give you some examples of what we are 
referring to. If you are wearing a blouse that barely meets the waist 
of your slacks and some of your skin showswhile you are moving around, 
or simply while you are walking, sitting, or kneeling, our minds are 
geared to wonder what more of your body would look like further 
up….This causes our bodies to respond biologically, and suddenl we 
are fighting a war in our minds and bodies. And that war of lust is 
continuing often long, even hours, after you are gone. We hate this, 
because our “righteous man” wants to think pure thoughts….
When you wear low-cut tops which are in any degree revealing, or when 
you bend over, and they are revealing, this again causes us big 
problems in the flesh. Or if the back is out of your top, we 
automatically think that you do not have the undergarment on, and the 
Spirit and the flesh begin to fight again. Or when we see any glimpse 
of your undergarments, such as straps and the like, we have trouble. 
What we are trying to say is this: If it is not for sale, don’t 
advertise it. We really feel that the still small voice of the Holy 
Spirit speaks to you and nudges you when it is too tight, too short, 
too low, or too revealing. Will you listen to that voice? For the 
Scripture says, “Quench not the Spirit.” (1 Thess. 5:19)

Girls, do you know what we would really like? We would like to come 
among our Christian sisters and not have to fight and struggle in the 
flesh. We do not need to have to wrestle in the flesh at church or at 
church activities. We men, whether young, old, single or married, are 
faced with this every day among girls of the “world.” But we would like 
to have rest in our Spirit man when we come among Christian girls. 
After all, doesn’t the Scripture tell us to “come out from among the 
world and be you separate, saith the Lord.” (2 Cor. 6:17) It also tells 
us that “all that is in the world, the lust of the eye, and the lust of 
the flesh, is not of the Father, but is of the world.” (1 John 2:15) We 
are the church, not the world.
We know that people often use the verse, “Man looketh on the outward 
appearance, but God looketh on the heart,” (1 Sam. 16:7) to condone 
anything they wish to wear. This is one of the most misused/used 
out-of-context verses in the Bible. Conversely, the fact is, if your 
heart is pure, your outward appearance will be modest….
Girls can be fashionable and modest at the same time. To be honest, we 
respect you more when your appearance is modest, as the Scripture 
commands in 1 Timothy 2:9. We really do not want the kind of girl who 
dresses provocatively, for we know that if we marry her, she will still 
be that way in the presence of other men once we are married.
We know that we have Christian responsibilites toward girls, too. We 
must be careful to portray ourselves properly. We must treat you like 
ladies. If we are really committed Christian guys, we will strive to 
treat you like Jesus would. After all, you are daughters of God.
Thank you, dear Christian sisters, for hearing our hearts on this 
subject. Once we have conveyed the truth of the matter to you, you 
become responsible before God for what you do with the truth. We really 
are “our brother’s keeper.” (Genesis 4:9.) We know that there is a 
“cult of conformity” in our generation, but we as Christians “march to 
the beat of a different drummer.” Please, girls, do not say, “I don’t 
care,” but help us in these last days to live as close to Jesus as we 
can. Thank you so much.

Sincerely,

Committed Christian Guys”

I may not agree with all that the penman of the letter writes, but I sure can relate to his struggle. I have seen sisters in my own assembly dress less than appropriately at meetings, and its a real battle to “never look twice”. In all honesty, sisters dressing modestly does help avoid the stray look, and the stray thought, which could be germinate the seed of sin.

However, I do not think point of God’s admonition for women to dress modestly, is to keep brothers from sinning. Rather, it was in order that the “hidden man of the heart, in the incorruptible ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which in the sight of God is of great price” (1 Peter 3:4) may be displayed.

My point is: girls and women ought to dress modestly, not for the brother’s sake (helpful as that may be), but for the sake of pleasing God. 

Which brings me to another observation. I have met more than a few sisters who would care about how they dress to church, but are less modest when dressing outside of church. In church, I’d see them in long skirts, but on the street, in the mall or at the gym, much flesh is on show. Why? The impression I get (and I’d love to be wrong on this), is that the modesty they show in church is just to please the ‘church-people’, and not motivated by a desire to please God. This screams ‘hypocrisy’ at best. If modesty pleases God, and girls and women want to please God, they would be modest wherever they go. 

As for men, the bible teaches a number of things: “be sober-minded” (Titus 2:6). Husbands are taught to treat their wives “with honour, as fellow-heirs as the grace of life” (1 Peter 3:7). While instructed to husbands, there is no scriptural reason why unmarried boys and men cannot be taught to treat sisters the same way. While its difficult to keep the eye from roving, and the flesh from desiring, the bible says we are to “Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth,  fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry” (Col 3:5). 

Conclusion: 
1. Sisters, dress modestly. It pleases God, and we brothers would appreciate it.
2. Brothers, bring “into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ“ (2 Cor 10:5), and if you fail, and commit adultery in your heart, don’t blame the sisters. 

What do you think?

The cost-effectiveness of being organized

I found this article very interesting…

In this uncertain economy people need to do more with less, make do, do without, do the math, and do it themselves. Why not DO SOMETHING by investing time in getting organized? Here are eight motivating reasons to do it now:

 

Save money by knowing what you have. If you already know that you have three black turtleneck sweaters, you probably will not buy another one. Visibility should be one of the primary goals of any organizing project; in other words, can you easily see and find what you have?

Save money by using what you have. If you can gain that visibility and easily see what is in your pantry and refrigerator, you are less likely to have to throw out stale food later that you forgot about purchasing.

Find things you lost or didn’t even realize you had. We once found over $5000 in undeposited checks and cash in the home of one of our clients, essentially paying for our own services in the process. Your results from organizing projects may not be quite as dramatic, but you will probably find unused gift cards, rebate opportunities, and warranty information that can help you get some money back, and you might even find a $20 bill in an old purse or pocket too.

Reduce costs. If you are unorganized, you may be routinely paying unnecessary costs like late fees and incurring higher interest rates because of your irregular payment history. You may also find upon organizing your finances that you’ve been paying for something you’re not using, like a gym membership or even a storage unit rental fee.

Save time. Gaining efficiencies through the organizing process means you are getting back some of your time, and as we all know, time is money. In fact, time is more precious than money, because you can never get that wasted time back. Not spending an hour locating your bills or keys every month means you have another hour to spend on what is important to you.

Sell your house faster. If you are downsizing to save money, you can speed up the process of selling your home by de-cluttering your environment and making it more show-ready. Closets and other storage areas look bigger with fewer items in them, and if buyers want to envision themselves in the home, your “stuff” makes it harder for them to put themselves in the picture.

Get great tax deductions for charitable donations. A byproduct of many organizing projects is usually a large donation pile, and most people grossly undervalue what they are giving away to charity. Get the most tax benefit for your donations by quickly tallying up the actual fair market values using It’s Deductible Online from Intuit. It’s like the “Blue Book” for valuing household items. It’s free and only takes a few moments, and there is a tax savings calculator that adds up your savings as you enter your items. You can also get this information in booklet form from Money For Your Used Clothing.

Feel less stress. According to a Fast Company magazine article in 2003, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention state unequivocally that 80% of our medical expenditures are now stress-related. Getting control of your belongings and your finances means you will experience less stress, which means less cost in health expenses and less unproductive time off work for illness.

Now, I’m the last person you would consider to be organized. Chin Ai would vouch for this, and (at the risk of generalizing) many men won’t admit how unorganized they are, no matter how they try to justify it.

There has been many times i’ll be ransacking the house looking for some document, and Chin Ai will stroll up to me and say, “Let me find it for you”, and within minutes, she’s back and handing a panting, perspiring husband what he was looking for in the past hour. All because she’s organized. 

Being organized helps in our spiritual life too. When we sit down to do our bible studies, we know exactly where the concordance is. We can easily find that notepad where we keep favourite bible verses. We can quickly look up a commentary. Always be aware that the flesh is not keen to do spiritual things, and being organized helps keep us focussed on the task at hand, and won’t give much room for the flesh to butt in and interfere.

I like to do my quite time in a organized location. The more mess around you, the more things can distract you as you try to spend serious time with your Heavenly Father. More things to capture your attention and set your mind going off on a tangent. 

Lets all try to be organized. After all, our Father in heaven is a ‘God of order’. 

nothing but the blood

But i want to ask myself, am I really seeking the way into the presence of God by the Blood or by something else? What do I mean when I say, “by the blood”? I mean simply that I recognize my sins, that i confess that i have need of cleansing sins, that i confess that i have need of cleansing and of atonement, and that I come to God on the basis of the finished work of the Lord Jesus. I approach God through His merit alone, and never on the basis of my attainment; never, for example, on the ground that I have been extrac kind or patient today, or that I have done something for the Lord this morning. I have to come by way of the Blood every time. the temptation to so many of us when we try to approach God si to think that because God has been dealing with us — because He has been taking steps to bring us into something more of Himself, and has been teaching us deeper lessons of the Cross — He has thereby set ebfore us newer standards, and that only by attaining to these we can have a clear conscience before Him. No! A clear conscience is never based on our attainment; it can only be based on the work of the Lord Jesus in shedding of His Blood.

Watchman Nee, The Normal Christian Life

So true, and so relevant. How many times we unconsciousy think we that can be saved by faith, but live by works. 

Mr. Watchman Nee later says… “But for the present, let us be satisfied with the Blood, that it is there, and that it is enough”

Are Christians responsible enough?

Recently, a dear sister asked for some help in drafting a template for consent letters to be given out to youth group kids’ parents to allow them to participate in a youth camp.

The consent letter however, includes a disclaimer which parents are to sign, which relieves the church of responsibility in the event of accidents. While I was thinking of some appropriate wording for the disclaimer, some questions popped into my mind, which ended up troubling me a little.

What is the purpose of a consent letter?

1. It is written proof that the children in the group have been taken with the parent’s knowledge
2. Our own confidence that the children have joined the activity with their parent’s knowledge.
3. Useful if there are any police roadblocks and they ask for proof that these children have not been kidnapped.

So yes, a consent letter is important when the church organizes a trip and takes under aged children along.

Sample disclaimer:

I understand that while every effort will be taken to ensure the safety of the child(ren) above, I will not hold InsertChurchNameHere responsible for any loss/damage of belongings and/or injury to the person.

Signature

 

……………………………………………………………………………….

 

Name of Parent/Guardian : _____________________________

 

What is the purpose of the disclaimer?

This is where I had a bit of problem. I can only think of one reason:

1. To protect the church from legal action by the parent in the event of an accident.
   

This raised two questions in my mind as I looked at it in the light of Scripture:

1. Are we taught this in the bible, i.e. to not be responsible for accidents that happen to children under our supervision? Are there any biblical principles, precepts, or practice that can justify this? I could not think of any. It appears to be a worldly practice more than a biblical one.
2. Should such a disclaimer be made to the brethren? Didn’t Paul condemn the Corinthians for bringing one another to the public courts for judgment? Paul says that among Christians, disputes ought to be settled within local assembly? (1 Cor 6:1-8)

Aren’t we all part of a family? If I take my brother’s kids out on a picnic, or camp, do I ask him to sign a disclaimer? No way, its unthinkable. I should not have fear of legal action from a Christian brother, nor should I have any intention of taking legal action against a Christian brother. If anything happens, we’ll sort it out as brethren.

I can understand if we make this disclaimer to non-believing parents, as they are not part of God’s family, but I’m just not comfortable with this idea of getting my own brethren to sign such a statement.

What about you?